Fear

A drawing by Jina Wallwork

Fear - Jina Wallwork

 

Inside every fear there is also hope. Although, it has chosen a disguise that hides the substance behind the wish. My body trembles, as my mind fills with possibilities, because I know that hope carried me when times were difficult and to question hope could lead to despair. I may destroy the illusions that I've created for myself. I fear the truth because hope has witnessed my suffering, held my hand, and told me that everything would be ok. Hope was a necessity during times of stress. I welcomed its presence, but there comes a time when hope must be discarded in favor of truth. I can't walk blindfolded into the future. I need to view the world as it is and accept what my eyes reveal. Hope is always a final refuge when all seems lost, yet it contains only a promise of better days. If I hold on to hope, without investigating its foundations, then I risk stagnating within a fantasy. I know there are words that must be spoken and questions answered. I must enter a place of courage and act in accordance with my true needs. I must kiss hope goodbye and accept that my world may be shaken by the outcome. I'm prepared to face a difficult path because stagnation leads me to question my own cowardice. I'm grateful that hope has sustained me. It has given me the chance to pause and consider my next step, but now I realize that only fear is holding me back. Hope sweetens the taste of stillness, while it asks me to step beyond this point. Hope, I wish you farewell as I step forward. You belong to a present circumstance and the future will bring your destruction. Your absence is inevitable because you will either disappear due to a lack of substance or you will become obsolete when prayers are answered. Hope asks me to step forward, yet it is incapable of joining me.

A drawing by Jina Wallwork
A drawing by Jina Wallwork